"Bloody typical, you dip your 'little axe' in one bloody Dwarf maiden and suddenly your tramping through the ruins of Mordheim an exile from your own homeland!"
"OK so the maiden in question was my brothers wife and it was during the reception festivities, but come on!"
"Of course the quick fix was to become a Troll Slayer and I even went so far as to get the hair cut but have you ever seen a Troll? Their bloody ENORMOUS!"
"And I'm not allowed to just shoot the bloody thing in the back from a safe distance..... NOOOOOOOO.... I'm supposed to get up close and personal with just a bloody axe!"
"Yer sod all that, pass me the heavy armour and the hand cannon!"
 |
| "Love the Hair style, just not the life style!" |
"So we're mining a diamond stream we found in the Bretonnian forest when we come home one night to find some human broad holed up in our cottage and animal shit everywhere."
"Never really been into tall birds but shes pretty enough for a human I suppose."
"Turns out she's a princess who has been on the run from her step mother who just tried to have her killed. Shes now on her way to Mordheim to get rich quick so she can return and kick the 'witches' arse back to where she come from."
"Some detailed negotiation later and we are on our way to Mordheim to help her mine Wyrd stone and then get her back on the throne with the funds."
"Once she's Queen we get the old birds 'know all' magic mirror and a cut of all the mining rights in her kingdom. RESULT!!!!"
"Now all we have to do is stay alive long enough to collect."